Deuteronomy 7

¹When the LORD thy God shall bring thee into the land whither thou goest to possess it, and hath cast out many nations before thee, the Hittites, and the Girgashites, and the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites, seven nations greater and mightier than thou;

²And when the LORD thy God shall deliver them before thee; thou shalt smite them, and utterly destroy them; thou shalt make no covenant with them, nor shew mercy unto them:

³Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son.

Hang on was not Mrs Moses no.1 a Midianite and Mrs Moses no.2 Ethiopian ?

Why is it Ok for Moses to fuck outside his ethnicity and no one else.

⁴For they will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of the LORD be kindled against you, and destroy thee suddenly.

Well as soon as Moses and his crew can get to you anyway.

⁵But thus shall ye deal with them; ye shall destroy their altars, and break down their images, and cut down their groves, and burn their graven images with fire.

⁶For thou art an holy people unto the LORD thy God: the LORD thy God hath chosen thee to be a special people unto himself, above all people that are upon the face of the earth.

⁷The LORD did not set his love upon you, nor choose you, because ye were more in number than any people; for ye were the fewest of all people:

How very democratic of him.

You know the more I read about this so called god the less I believe he is worthy of worship. Invite him into my heart ......I wouldn't even want him in the same universe.

⁸But because the LORD loved you, and because he would keep the oath which he had sworn unto your fathers, hath the LORD brought you out with a mighty hand, and redeemed you out of the house of bondmen, from the hand of Pharaoh king of Egypt.

⁹Know therefore that the LORD thy God, he is God, the faithful God, which keepeth covenant and mercy with them that love him and keep his commandments to a thousand generations;

Arn't we talking about the god who managed to almost drown the contents of the Ark because he forgot about Noah, the god who managed to forget his promise to Abaraham for 400 years,the god that has apparently chosen a small segment ofthe alleged descendants of Noah and his family and turned his back on the rest, the god that encourages behaviour that us mere mortals are trying to put behind us as we strive for true civilization.

¹⁰And repayeth them that hate him to their face, to destroy them: he will not be slack to him that hateth him, he will repay him to his face.

And he calls himself our Father ?

¹¹Thou shalt therefore keep the commandments, and the statutes, and the judgments, which I command thee this day, to do them.

Because obeying his laws is much better than being nice to your fellow man

¹²Wherefore it shall come to pass, if ye hearken to these judgments, and keep, and do them, that the LORD thy God shall keep unto thee the covenant and the mercy which he sware unto thy fathers:

1,000 generations he said , well modern Israel must have exceeded that so now thy are in the same boat as the rest of us. That means all these religious kooks are as fucked as the rest of us.

¹³And he will love thee, and bless thee, and multiply thee: he will also bless the fruit of thy womb, and the fruit of thy land, thy corn, and thy wine, and thine oil, the increase of thy kine, and the flocks of thy sheep, in the land which he sware unto thy fathers to give thee.

If this were true surely the Israelites and their descendant would be living peacefully and would own the world a sort of Jewtopia.

¹⁴Thou shalt be blessed above all people: there shall not be male or female barren among you, or among your cattle.

No ! don't believe a word.

¹⁵And the LORD will take away from thee all sickness, and will put none of the evil diseases of Egypt, which thou knowest, upon thee; but will lay them upon all them that hate thee.

Take away all sickness. Fuck me these are some of the sickest bastards I have ever read about. and they encourage children to read this shit.

¹⁶And thou shalt consume all the people which the LORD thy God shall deliver thee; thine eye shall have no pity upon them: neither shalt thou serve their gods; for that will be a snare unto thee.

Yup ! That is definitely sick.

¹⁷If thou shalt say in thine heart, These nations are more than I; how can I dispossess them?

¹⁸Thou shalt not be afraid of them: but shalt well remember what the LORD thy God did unto Pharaoh, and unto all Egypt;

Take the credit for natural disasters.

¹⁹The great temptations which thine eyes saw, and the signs, and the wonders, and the mighty hand, and the stretched out arm, whereby the LORD thy God brought thee out: so shall the LORD thy God do unto all the people of whom thou art afraid.

²⁰Moreover the LORD thy God will send the hornet among them, until they that are left, and hide themselves from thee, be destroyed.

²¹Thou shalt not be affrighted at them: for the LORD thy God is among you, a mighty God and terrible.

He might be terrible but his only might is the ignorence and sheer bloody mindedness of his followers.

²²And the LORD thy God will put out those nations before thee by little and little: thou mayest not consume them at once, lest the beasts of the field increase upon thee.

²³But the LORD thy God shall deliver them unto thee, and shall destroy them with a mighty destruction, until they be destroyed.

²⁴And he shall deliver their kings into thine hand, and thou shalt destroy their name from under heaven: there shall no man be able to stand before thee, until thou have destroyed them.

²⁵The graven images of their gods shall ye burn with fire: thou shalt not desire the silver or gold that is on them, nor take it unto thee, lest thou be snared therin: for it is an abomination to the LORD thy God.

I'll bet this is another commandment that somehow gets adjusted.

²⁶Neither shalt thou bring an abomination into thine house, lest thou be a cursed thing like it: but thou shalt utterly detest it, and thou shalt utterly abhor it; for it is a cursed thing.

What is an abomination save the believe that you can commit evil acts to please your imaginary freind.

Numbers Recap

Well what a palaver.

First as suggested by the title we have literally the numbers of men in the tribes. This is followed by the order of the tribal tents or the hierarchy of the owners of these tents. As said earlier the tribe of the Levites as priests were allocated the top of the food chain. Then the hierarchy of the Levites is described.
Then we move on to great offerings from the twelve tribes chiefs given by the princes of these tribes. This involves some precious things and of course, a lot of sacrifices to de lard.
This has apparently turned the meandering muppets into an army which allegedly are then led by de lard.

It is then dropped in that Moses had married an Ethiopian woman.[ Is this a possible inference that Moses is also a title and this is not the same Moses that led the people from Egypt,further hints that this is a new improved Moses, is that although still psychopathic, does seem to be more level headed]
This inadvertently leads to Aaron and Miriam,(a variant of Mary) coming forward with a few complaints about this other wife.Which for some reason leads to Miriam being apparently struck with leprosy by de lard. Moses then intervenes and she is apparently cured but ejected for a week.

De lard then tells Moses to send out spies to gather information of the surrounding nations. (why couldn't he just give him the info himself ? After all if anyone could know it should be de lard.) Obviously having been brought up with high moral values and strength of character being SO much closer to de lard than the rest of us mortals, lied through their back teeth.

A chap called Korah a grandson of Levi then leads a minor rebellion( some 250 men)Moses utilising all his man management promptly makes arrangements for them and their families(except Korah's for some reason) and anyone who may have the slightest possibility of agreeing with them gassed struck down by de ever lovin' lard with a localised plague.(14,700)
After making sure to dispose of the evidence, Moses then makes the Israelites take special precautions in the disposal of the bodies.

We then see either a repeat of the incident with the water from Edom or as I suspect a mistake made at some point between the possible events and the final edition of this book. Whether a mistake in the Oral tradition or two different scrolls being merged. Either way instead of the battle almost immediately in the first version, the Israelites now go forward on a mission to conquer......Oh wait that may be the same!!!Before they go to "war". Aaron and his son Eleazer are taken up to mount Hor, Eleazer puts on Aarons clothes and, presto ! Aaron is dead. This has a profound effect on de lard, as he stops announcing himself with the prefix..."I am de lard your gawd" every time he speaks to Moses.
In the name of the all merciful lard the Israelites capture some Amorite cities, killing all but virgin girls. Some of these survivors are offered as a "heave offering to de lard" ????.......Can you feel the love and mercy ?

We are introduced to a character Balak king of Moab, son of Zippor.[Any relation to Zipporah, daughter of Jethro,the midianite priest,Moses father in law ]who sends for Balaam to mediate between him and the invaders. Balaam, A man who beats his donkey and manages to fall off and hit his head in such a way that he gives himself Auditory Hallucinations. Believing god has reprimaded him (cos god loves animals) he then, with perfect Old Testament logic sacrifices 7 rams and 7 oxen to de lard. He reports to Balak with his hallucination.
Resistance is futile, the ravening hordes of Israel sweep across Canaan with a finesse not matched until Genghis Khan.




The last few chapters are mostly devoted to the splitting up of the lands,cities,gold, cattle and women.

Conclusion
Aside from yet again underlining de lards impotence, stupidity senility and blindness it just opens more questions.
Was there more than one Moses ?
Why, if the Israelites, who allegedly had seen all this evidence of gods so called power, were there so many dissidents.
Why if these incidents ,especially the conquest of Canaan are not recorded in any of the surrounding lands.
Or are the Israelites actually the "mysterious sea people" recorded in the some of the Amarna letters ?
Why is Moses thought of as good man when historically there are few that have been responsible(in their lifetime) for greater numbers of attrocities and murders of his fellow human beings ?

Numbers 12

¹And Miriam and Aaron spake against Moses because of the Ethiopian woman whom he had married: for he had married an Ethiopian woman.

Aaron is complaining ? Fucking a goat with god is OK for him, but marrying an Ethiopian woman is something to complain about. It's just jealousy that's all, because theres one thing guaranteed from an Ethiopian ...they will always swallow.

²And they said, Hath the LORD indeed spoken only by Moses? hath he not spoken also by us? And the LORD heard it.

"Spoken BY us" not spoken TO us..... That about sums it up

³(Now the man Moses was very meek, above all the men which were upon the face of the earth.)

Meek....MEEK.....has the meaning of meek changed ? Moses has been shown to be tyrannical,bull headed, forceful even batshit crazy but meek, where or when the fuck did that happen ?

⁴And the LORD spake suddenly unto Moses, and unto Aaron, and unto Miriam, Come out ye three unto the tabernacle of the congregation. And they three came out.

So god has suddenly lowered his standards and started talking to a woman?Is this the same Miriam we were introduced to in exodus ?Or is Miriam a general phrase like "Sheila" in modern day Australia

⁵And the LORD came down in the pillar of the cloud, and stood in the door of the tabernacle, and called Aaron and Miriam: and they both came forth.

Are women allowed in the big tent ? How come god has ignored women since Eve went against her god given nature and questioned gods logic and then disobeyed him and all of a sudden is on first name terms with a woman who may or may not be Moses and Aarons sister ?

⁶And he said, Hear now my words: If there be a prophet among you, I the LORD will make myself known unto him in a vision, and will speak unto him in a dream.

A direct conversion is to much trouble then, has the cost of pyrotechnics gone up.

Also note god say's "him"

⁷My servant Moses is not so, who is faithful in all mine house.

So Moses is not a prophet... more of a profit I suppose.

⁸With him will I speak mouth to mouth, even apparently, and not in dark speeches; and the similitude of the LORD shall he behold: wherefore then were ye not afraid to speak against my servant Moses?

⁹And the anger of the LORD was kindled against them; and he departed.

¹⁰And the cloud departed from off the tabernacle; and, behold, Miriam became leprous, white as snow: and Aaron looked upon Miriam, and, behold, she was leprous.

Ah ! I see, she is the "token" previously unknown member of the cast.

¹¹And Aaron said unto Moses, Alas, my lord, I beseech thee, lay not the sin upon us, wherein we have done foolishly, and wherein we have sinned.

¹²Let her not be as one dead, of whom the flesh is half consumed when he cometh out of his mother's womb.

¹³And Moses cried unto the LORD, saying, Heal her now, O God, I beseech thee.

¹⁴And the LORD said unto Moses, If her father had but spit in her face, should she not be ashamed seven days? let her be shut out from the camp seven days, and after that let her be received in again.

¹⁵And Miriam was shut out from the camp seven days: and the people journeyed not till Miriam was brought in again.

So brought into the script and cursed then healed .....will she become a regular member of the cast we shall see.

¹⁶And afterward the people removed from Hazeroth, and pitched in the wilderness of Paran.