Leviticus 10

¹And Nadab and Abihu, the sons of Aaron, took either of them his censer, and put fire therein, and put incense thereon, and offered strange fire before the LORD, which he commanded them not.

The incense no doubt containing something to change the colour and/or burning quality of the flames.

²And there went out fire from the LORD, and devoured them, and they died before the LORD.

An early version of gunpowder perhaps. Not explosive, but rapid burning, possibly something mastered by the Midianite priesthood but not yet learned by the young siblings. Or maybe they wasn't wearing their magic underpants.

³Then Moses said unto Aaron, This is it that the LORD spake, saying, I will be sanctified in them that come nigh me, and before all the people I will be glorified. And Aaron held his peace.

I would have expected him to say something like.."Look Bro, They fucked up. Now I know you're pissed off, but if you make a fuss you'll ruin it for us all."

⁴And Moses called Mishael and Elzaphan, the sons of Uzziel the uncle of Aaron, and said unto them, Come near, carry your brethren from before the sanctuary out of the camp.
⁵So they went near, and carried them in their coats out of the camp; as Moses had said.
⁶And Moses said unto Aaron, and unto Eleazar and unto Ithamar, his sons, Uncover not your heads, neither rend your clothes; lest ye die, and lest wrath come upon all the people: but let your brethren, the whole house of Israel, bewail the burning which the LORD hath kindled.
⁷And ye shall not go out from the door of the tabernacle of the congregation, lest ye die: for the anointing oil of the LORD is upon you. And they did according to the word of Moses.

Which is to say ... mourn in private don't fuck up the gravy train.

⁸And the LORD spake unto Aaron, saying,
⁹Do not drink wine nor strong drink, thou, nor thy sons with thee, when ye go into the tabernacle of the congregation, lest ye die: it shall be a statute for ever throughout your generations:

Which is to say ..Don't get pissed up and spill the beans.

¹⁰And that ye may put difference between holy and unholy, and between unclean and clean;
¹¹And that ye may teach the children of Israel all the statutes which the LORD hath spoken unto them by the hand of Moses.
¹²And Moses spake unto Aaron, and unto Eleazar and unto Ithamar, his sons that were left, Take the meat offering that remaineth of the offerings of the LORD made by fire, and eat it without leaven beside the altar: for it is most holy:
¹³And ye shall eat it in the holy place, because it is thy due, and thy sons' due, of the sacrifices of the LORD made by fire: for so I am commanded.
¹⁴And the wave breast and heave shoulder shall ye eat in a clean place; thou, and thy sons, and thy daughters with thee: for they be thy due, and thy sons' due, which are given out of the sacrifices of peace offerings of the children of Israel.
¹⁵The heave shoulder and the wave breast shall they bring with the offerings made by fire of the fat, to wave it for a wave offering before the LORD; and it shall be thine, and thy sons' with thee, by a statute for ever; as the LORD hath commanded.
¹⁶And Moses diligently sought the goat of the sin offering, and, behold, it was burnt: and he was angry with Eleazar and Ithamar, the sons of Aaron which were left alive, saying,

Oh no! The burnt offering has been overcooked......Two lads were killed that's OK but burn Moses dinner ???

¹⁷Wherefore have ye not eaten the sin offering in the holy place, seeing it is most holy, and God hath given it you to bear the iniquity of the congregation, to make atonement for them before the LORD?
¹⁸Behold, the blood of it was not brought in within the holy place: ye should indeed have eaten it in the holy place, as I commanded.
¹⁹And Aaron said unto Moses, Behold, this day have they offered their sin offering and their burnt offering before the LORD; and such things have befallen me: and if I had eaten the sin offering to day, should it have been accepted in the sight of the LORD?

Another interpretation of this is

¹⁹ Then Aaron answered Moses, “Today my sons presented both their sin offering and their burnt offering to the Lord. And yet this tragedy has happened to me. If I had eaten the people’s sin offering on such a tragic day as this, would the Lord have been pleased?” ²⁰ And when Moses heard this, he was satisfied. ²⁰And when Moses heard that, he was content.

Another way of reading it is

Your god is bollocks and has no effect on anything.

Leviticus 9

¹And it came to pass on the eighth day, that Moses called Aaron and his sons, and the elders of Israel;

Are we to assume then, that they do not get a day of rest from kissing gods arse for a week.

²And he said unto Aaron, Take thee a young calf for a sin offering, and a ram for a burnt offering, without blemish, and offer them before the LORD.

³And unto the children of Israel thou shalt speak, saying, Take ye a kid of the goats for a sin offering; and a calf and a lamb, both of the first year, without blemish, for a burnt offering;

⁴Also a bullock and a ram for peace offerings, to sacrifice before the LORD; and a meat offering mingled with oil: for to day the LORD will appear unto you.

⁵And they brought that which Moses commanded before the tabernacle of the congregation: and all the congregation drew near and stood before the LORD.

⁶And Moses said, This is the thing which the LORD commanded that ye should do: and the glory of the LORD shall appear unto you.

Yes we know, the all-powerful almighty in all his glory needs pampering like a petulant schoolgirl having her first period.

⁷And Moses said unto Aaron, Go unto the altar, and offer thy sin offering, and thy burnt offering, and make an atonement for thyself, and for the people: and offer the offering of the people, and make an atonement for them; as the LORD commanded.

⁸Aaron therefore went unto the altar, and slew the calf of the sin offering, which was for himself.

What naughties has Aaron been doing

⁹And the sons of Aaron brought the blood unto him: and he dipped his finger in the blood, and put it upon the horns of the altar, and poured out the blood at the bottom of the altar:

¹⁰But the fat, and the kidneys, and the caul above the liver of the sin offering, he burnt upon the altar; as the LORD commanded Moses.

¹¹And the flesh and the hide he burnt with fire without the camp.

¹²And he slew the burnt offering; and Aaron's sons presented unto him the blood, which he sprinkled round about upon the altar.

¹³And they presented the burnt offering unto him, with the pieces thereof, and the head: and he burnt them upon the altar.

¹⁴And he did wash the inwards and the legs, and burnt them upon the burnt offering on the altar.

¹⁵And he brought the people's offering, and took the goat, which was the sin offering for the people, and slew it, and offered it for sin, as the first.

¹⁶And he brought the burnt offering, and offered it according to the manner.

¹⁷And he brought the meat offering, and took an handful thereof, and burnt it upon the altar, beside the burnt sacrifice of the morning.

¹⁸He slew also the bullock and the ram for a sacrifice of peace offerings, which was for the people: and Aaron's sons presented unto him the blood, which he sprinkled upon the altar round about,

¹⁹And the fat of the bullock and of the ram, the rump, and that which covereth the inwards, and the kidneys, and the caul above the liver:

²⁰And they put the fat upon the breasts, and he burnt the fat upon the altar:

²¹And the breasts and the right shoulder Aaron waved for a wave offering before the LORD; as Moses commanded.

I still don't get this wave offering thing. They are not in the proximity of the sea so it is not to calm that kind of wave. The only other option is a camp cooee kind of wave you would expect from John Inman.

²²And Aaron lifted up his hand toward the people, and blessed them, and came down from offering of the sin offering, and the burnt offering, and peace offerings.

²³And Moses and Aaron went into the tabernacle of the congregation, and came out, and blessed the people: and the glory of the LORD appeared unto all the people.

The glory of the lord!! Could that have been any vaguer ?

These last two chapters could imply that these eight days of ritual have been constant this in turn implies sleep deprivation and therefore brainwashing or am i jumping to conclusions ?

²⁴And there came a fire out from before the LORD, and consumed upon the altar the burnt offering and the fat: which when all the people saw, they shouted, and fell on their faces.

Leviticus 8

¹And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

²Take Aaron and his sons with him, and the garments, and the anointing oil, and a bullock for the sin offering, and two rams, and a basket of unleavened bread;

³And gather thou all the congregation together unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.

⁴And Moses did as the LORD commanded him; and the assembly was gathered together unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.

⁵And Moses said unto the congregation, This is the thing which the LORD commanded to be done.

⁶And Moses brought Aaron and his sons, and washed them with water.

⁷And he put upon him the coat, and girded him with the girdle, and clothed him with the robe, and put the ephod upon him, and he girded him with the curious girdle of the ephod, and bound it unto him therewith.

⁸And he put the breastplate upon him: also he put in the breastplate the Urim and the Thummim.

⁹And he put the mitre upon his head; also upon the mitre, even upon his forefront, did he put the golden plate, the holy crown; as the LORD commanded Moses.

¹⁰And Moses took the anointing oil, and anointed the tabernacle and all that was therein, and sanctified them.

¹¹And he sprinkled thereof upon the altar seven times, and anointed the altar and all his vessels, both the laver and his foot, to sanctify them.

¹²And he poured of the anointing oil upon Aaron's head, and anointed him, to sanctify him.

¹³And Moses brought Aaron's sons, and put coats upon them, and girded them with girdles, and put bonnets upon them; as the LORD commanded Moses.

All this fetish gear just for a burger. Then again look at religious leaders today what is it about a stupid hat that makes people think that the wearer has some mystical ability to communicate with some god figure.

When will people wake up and see that some cunt in a stupid hat is just that....A cunt in a stupid hat.

¹⁴And he brought the bullock for the sin offering: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the bullock for the sin offering.

¹⁵And he slew it; and Moses took the blood, and put it upon the horns of the altar round about with his finger, and purified the altar, and poured the blood at the bottom of the altar, and sanctified it, to make reconciliation upon it.

Purified must have had a different meaning back then

¹⁶And he took all the fat that was upon the inwards, and the caul above the liver, and the two kidneys, and their fat, and Moses burned it upon the altar.

¹⁷But the bullock, and his hide, his flesh, and his dung, he burnt with fire without the camp; as the LORD commanded Moses.

¹⁸And he brought the ram for the burnt offering: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the ram.

¹⁹And he killed it; and Moses sprinkled the blood upon the altar round about.

²⁰And he cut the ram into pieces; and Moses burnt the head, and the pieces, and the fat.

²¹And he washed the inwards and the legs in water; and Moses burnt the whole ram upon the altar: it was a burnt sacrifice for a sweet savour, and an offering made by fire unto the LORD; as the LORD commanded Moses.

²²And he brought the other ram, the ram of consecration: and Aaron and his sons laid their hands upon the head of the ram.

²³And he slew it; and Moses took of the blood of it, and put it upon the tip of Aaron's right ear, and upon the thumb of his right hand, and upon the great toe of his right foot.

²⁴And he brought Aaron's sons, and Moses put of the blood upon the tip of their right ear, and upon the thumbs of their right hands, and upon the great toes of their right feet: and Moses sprinkled the blood upon the altar round about.

²⁵And he took the fat, and the rump, and all the fat that was upon the inwards, and the caul above the liver, and the two kidneys, and their fat, and the right shoulder:

²⁶And out of the basket of unleavened bread, that was before the LORD, he took one unleavened cake, and a cake of oiled bread, and one wafer, and put them on the fat, and upon the right shoulder:

²⁷And he put all upon Aaron's hands, and upon his sons' hands, and waved them for a wave offering before the LORD.

²⁸And Moses took them from off their hands, and burnt them on the altar upon the burnt offering: they were consecrations for a sweet savour: it is an offering made by fire unto the LORD.

²⁹And Moses took the breast, and waved it for a wave offering before the LORD: for of the ram of consecration it was Moses' part; as the LORD commanded Moses.

³⁰And Moses took of the anointing oil, and of the blood which was upon the altar, and sprinkled it upon Aaron, and upon his garments, and upon his sons, and upon his sons' garments with him; and sanctified Aaron, and his garments, and his sons, and his sons' garments with him.

³¹And Moses said unto Aaron and to his sons, Boil the flesh at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation: and there eat it with the bread that is in the basket of consecrations, as I commanded, saying, Aaron and his sons shall eat it.

³²And that which remaineth of the flesh and of the bread shall ye burn with fire.

³³And ye shall not go out of the door of the tabernacle of the congregation in seven days, until the days of your consecration be at an end: for seven days shall he consecrate you.

³⁴As he hath done this day, so the LORD hath commanded to do, to make an atonement for you.

³⁵Therefore shall ye abide at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation day and night seven days, and keep the charge of the LORD, that ye die not: for so I am commanded.

³⁶So Aaron and his sons did all things which the LORD commanded by the hand of Moses.
Fuck I am bored with this all I see is Moses and Aaron picking the best bits of good meat and twats steeped in ritual superstition lapping it up.
Is it just crowd mentality or are these poor sods fearful of being the one to say out loud "This is crap".

Leviticus 7

¹Likewise this is the law of the trespass offering: it is most holy
And yet another excuse for the "priesthood" to get free food at the "congregations" expense. I suppose that if any one spoke up they would be forced to pay another fine.

²In the place where they kill the burnt offering shall they kill the trespass offering: and the blood thereof shall he sprinkle round about upon the altar.
³And he shall offer of it all the fat thereof; the rump, and the fat that covereth the inwards,
⁴And the two kidneys, and the fat that is on them, which is by the flanks, and the caul that is above the liver, with the kidneys, it shall he take away:

What is it with the kidneys ? You can't beat good old steak and kidney, whether it's in a pie or pudding.

⁵And the priest shall burn them upon the altar for an offering made by fire unto the LORD: it is a trespass offering.
⁶Every male among the priests shall eat thereof: it shall be eaten in the holy place: it is most holy.

Eat a male in his holy place?
I'll swallow that
 
⁷As the sin offering is, so is the trespass offering: there is one law for them: the priest that maketh atonement therewith shall have it.
⁸And the priest that offereth any man's burnt offering, even the priest shall have to himself the skin of the burnt offering which he hath offered.
⁹And all the meat offering that is baken in the oven, and all that is dressed in the fryingpan, and in the pan, shall be the priest's that offereth it.
¹⁰And every meat offering, mingled with oil, and dry, shall all the sons of Aaron have, one as much as another.
¹¹And this is the law of the sacrifice of peace offerings, which he shall offer unto the LORD.
¹²If he offer it for a thanksgiving, then he shall offer with the sacrifice of thanksgiving unleavened cakes mingled with oil, and unleavened wafers anointed with oil, and cakes mingled with oil, of fine flour, fried.
¹³Besides the cakes, he shall offer for his offering leavened bread with the sacrifice of thanksgiving of his peace offerings.
¹⁴And of it he shall offer one out of the whole oblation for an heave offering unto the LORD, and it shall be the priest's that sprinkleth the blood of the peace offerings.
¹⁵And the flesh of the sacrifice of his peace offerings for thanksgiving shall be eaten the same day that it is offered; he shall not leave any of it until the morning.
¹⁶But if the sacrifice of his offering be a vow, or a voluntary offering, it shall be eaten the same day that he offereth his sacrifice: and on the morrow also the remainder of it shall be eaten:
¹⁷But the remainder of the flesh of the sacrifice on the third day shall be burnt with fire.
¹⁸And if any of the flesh of the sacrifice of his peace offerings be eaten at all on the third day, it shall not be accepted, neither shall it be imputed unto him that offereth it: it shall be an abomination, and the soul that eateth of it shall bear his iniquity.
¹⁹And the flesh that toucheth any unclean thing shall not be eaten; it shall be burnt with fire: and as for the flesh, all that be clean shall eat thereof.
²⁰But the soul that eateth of the flesh of the sacrifice of peace offerings, that pertain unto the LORD, having his uncleanness upon him, even that soul shall be cut off from his people.
²¹Moreover the soul that shall touch any unclean thing, as the uncleanness of man, or any unclean beast, or any abominable unclean thing, and eat of the flesh of the sacrifice of peace offerings, which pertain unto the LORD, even that soul shall be cut off from his people.
²²And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
²³Speak unto the children of Israel, saying, Ye shall eat no manner of fat, of ox, or of sheep, or of goat.
²⁴And the fat of the beast that dieth of itself, and the fat of that which is torn with beasts, may be used in any other use: but ye shall in no wise eat of it.
²⁵For whosoever eateth the fat of the beast, of which men offer an offering made by fire unto the LORD, even the soul that eateth it shall be cut off from his people.
²⁶Moreover ye shall eat no manner of blood, whether it be of fowl or of beast, in any of your dwellings.
²⁷Whatsoever soul it be that eateth any manner of blood, even that soul shall be cut off from his people.
²⁸And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,
²⁹Speak unto the children of Israel, saying, He that offereth the sacrifice of his peace offerings unto the LORD shall bring his oblation unto the LORD of the sacrifice of his peace offerings.
³⁰His own hands shall bring the offerings of the LORD made by fire, the fat with the breast, it shall he bring, that the breast may be waved for a wave offering before the LORD.
³¹And the priest shall burn the fat upon the altar: but the breast shall be Aaron's and his sons'.

I wonder whether the fat is wholly burnt, or whether some of the grease is retained ?.........Lube ?????

³²And the right shoulder shall ye give unto the priest for an heave offering of the sacrifices of your peace offerings.
³³He among the sons of Aaron, that offereth the blood of the peace offerings, and the fat, shall have the right shoulder for his part.
³⁴For the wave breast and the heave shoulder have I taken of the children of Israel from off the sacrifices of their peace offerings, and have given them unto Aaron the priest and unto his sons by a statute for ever from among the children of Israel.
³⁵This is the portion of the anointing of Aaron, and of the anointing of his sons, out of the offerings of the LORD made by fire, in the day when he presented them to minister unto the LORD in the priest's office;
³⁶Which the LORD commanded to be given them of the children of Israel, in the day that he anointed them, by a statute for ever throughout their generations.
³⁷This is the law of the burnt offering, of the meat offering, and of the sin offering, and of the trespass offering, and of the consecrations, and of the sacrifice of the peace offerings;

As far as I can see if you fuck up for any reason, its OK as long as you pay off the priesthood. Is this really the way a civilized society should work ? Oh wait that's exactly how it works. So the rich get richer and the poor well.....

³⁸Which the LORD commanded Moses in mount Sinai, in the day that he commanded the children of Israel to offer their oblations unto the LORD, in the wilderness of Sinai.

Leviticus 6

¹And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

²If a soul sin, and commit a trespass against the LORD, and lie unto his neighbour in that which was delivered him to keep, or in fellowship, or in a thing taken away by violence, or hath deceived his neighbour;

A trespass against the lord ?

Well maybe Jethro is reasonable but the historical, or should I say hysterical god, that has so far been portrayed. Anything could piss him off and therefore be considered a trespass.

³Or have found that which was lost, and lieth concerning it, and sweareth falsely; in any of all these that a man doeth, sinning therein:

⁴Then it shall be, because he hath sinned, and is guilty, that he shall restore that which he took violently away, or the thing which he hath deceitfully gotten, or that which was delivered him to keep, or the lost thing which he found,

How's that work then ? All the priesthoods riches were gained by deceit.

⁵Or all that about which he hath sworn falsely; he shall even restore it in the principal, and shall add the fifth part more thereto, and give it unto him to whom it appertaineth, in the day of his trespass offering.

⁶And he shall bring his trespass offering unto the LORD, a ram without blemish out of the flock, with thy estimation, for a trespass offering, unto the priest:

⁷And the priest shall make an atonement for him before the LORD: and it shall be forgiven him for any thing of all that he hath done in trespassing therein.

⁸And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

⁹Command Aaron and his sons, saying, This is the law of the burnt offering: It is the burnt offering, because of the burning upon the altar all night unto the morning, and the fire of the altar shall be burning in it.

¹⁰And the priest shall put on his linen garment, and his linen breeches shall he put upon his flesh, and take up the ashes which the fire hath consumed with the burnt offering on the altar, and he shall put them beside the altar.

Oh noes not the magic underpants.

¹¹And he shall put off his garments, and put on other garments, and carry forth the ashes without the camp unto a clean place.

Is this the same clean place as the previous clean place as it wouldn't be quite so clean with all the ashes, but would be cleaner than the doorway of the big tent.

¹²And the fire upon the altar shall be burning in it; it shall not be put out: and the priest shall burn wood on it every morning, and lay the burnt offering in order upon it; and he shall burn thereon the fat of the peace offerings.

¹³The fire shall ever be burning upon the altar; it shall never go out.

Have we swapped religions and practices

Maybe not, but perhaps there is some common ground. The question remains which influenced which ? This tale is set earlier than the earliest fire temples but was written down much later.

¹⁴And this is the law of the meat offering: the sons of Aaron shall offer it before the LORD, before the altar.

¹⁵And he shall take of it his handful, of the flour of the meat offering, and of the oil thereof, and all the frankincense which is upon the meat offering, and shall burn it upon the altar for a sweet savour, even the memorial of it, unto the LORD.

¹⁶And the remainder thereof shall Aaron and his sons eat: with unleavened bread shall it be eaten in the holy place; in the court of the tabernacle of the congregation they shall eat it.

¹⁷It shall not be baken with leaven. I have given it unto them for their portion of my offerings made by fire; it is most holy, as is the sin offering, and as the trespass offering.

¹⁸All the males among the children of Aaron shall eat of it. It shall be a statute for ever in your generations concerning the offerings of the LORD made by fire: every one that toucheth them shall be holy.

¹⁹And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

²⁰This is the offering of Aaron and of his sons, which they shall offer unto the LORD in the day when he is anointed; the tenth part of an ephah of fine flour for a meat offering perpetual, half of it in the morning, and half thereof at night.

²¹In a pan it shall be made with oil; and when it is baken, thou shalt bring it in: and the baken pieces of the meat offering shalt thou offer for a sweet savour unto the LORD.

²²And the priest of his sons that is anointed in his stead shall offer it: it is a statute for ever unto the LORD; it shall be wholly burnt.

²³For every meat offering for the priest shall be wholly burnt: it shall not be eaten.

²⁴And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

²⁵Speak unto Aaron and to his sons, saying, This is the law of the sin offering: In the place where the burnt offering is killed shall the sin offering be killed before the LORD: it is most holy.

²⁶The priest that offereth it for sin shall eat it: in the holy place shall it be eaten, in the court of the tabernacle of the congregation.

²⁷Whatsoever shall touch the flesh thereof shall be holy: and when there is sprinkled of the blood thereof upon any garment, thou shalt wash that whereon it was sprinkled in the holy place.

²⁸But the earthen vessel wherein it is sodden shall be broken: and if it be sodden in a brasen pot, it shall be both scoured, and rinsed in water.

See I knew I would eventually find a useful rule, you don't want to be using blood stained pots especially when they have been sitting in the sun. Mind you heating them to sterilise may have been cheaper especially if they utilised the eternal flame. Remember the eternal flame they must keep burning even though they are forbidden to have a fire on the sabbath.

²⁹All the males among the priests shall eat thereof: it is most holy.

³⁰And no sin offering, whereof any of the blood is brought into the tabernacle of the congregation to reconcile withal in the holy place, shall be eaten: it shall be burnt in the fire.

Leviticus 5

¹And if a soul sin, and hear the voice of swearing, and is a witness, whether he hath seen or known of it; if he do not utter it, then he shall bear his iniquity.

Thou shalt grass on thy neighbor, or pay the price.

²Or if a soul touch any unclean thing, whether it be a carcase of an unclean beast, or a carcase of unclean cattle, or the carcase of unclean creeping things, and if it be hidden from him; he also shall be unclean, and guilty.

Washing does not occur then?

³Or if he touch the uncleanness of man, whatsoever uncleanness it be that a man shall be defiled withal, and it be hid from him; when he knoweth of it, then he shall be guilty.

Does this mean god doesn't like copraphilliacs.

⁴Or if a soul swear, pronouncing with his lips to do evil, or to do good, whatsoever it be that a man shall pronounce with an oath, and it be hid from him; when he knoweth of it, then he shall be guilty in one of these.

Well fuck me who would have believed it ? God thinks you're a cunt if you swear.

⁵And it shall be, when he shall be guilty in one of these things, that he shall confess that he hath sinned in that thing:

⁶And he shall bring his trespass offering unto the LORD for his sin which he hath sinned, a female from the flock, a lamb or a kid of the goats, for a sin offering; and the priest shall make an atonement for him concerning his sin.

Ahh there it is the price. Not only when you stub your toe or strike your thumb with a hammer do you get rewarded with pain, it will also cost you......

⁷And if he be not able to bring a lamb, then he shall bring for his trespass, which he hath committed, two turtledoves, or two young pigeons, unto the LORD; one for a sin offering, and the other for a burnt offering.

⁸And he shall bring them unto the priest, who shall offer that which is for the sin offering first, and wring off his head from his neck, but shall not divide it asunder:

⁹And he shall sprinkle of the blood of the sin offering upon the side of the altar; and the rest of the blood shall be wrung out at the bottom of the altar: it is a sin offering.

¹⁰And he shall offer the second for a burnt offering, according to the manner: and the priest shall make an atonement for him for his sin which he hath sinned, and it shall be forgiven him.

¹¹But if he be not able to bring two turtledoves, or two young pigeons, then he that sinned shall bring for his offering the tenth part of an ephah of fine flour for a sin offering; he shall put no oil upon it, neither shall he put any frankincense thereon: for it is a sin offering.

¹²Then shall he bring it to the priest, and the priest shall take his handful of it, even a memorial thereof, and burn it on the altar, according to the offerings made by fire unto the LORD: it is a sin offering.

¹³And the priest shall make an atonement for him as touching his sin that he hath sinned in one of these, and it shall be forgiven him: and the remnant shall be the priest's, as a meat offering.

¹⁴And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

¹⁵If a soul commit a trespass, and sin through ignorance, in the holy things of the LORD; then he shall bring for his trespass unto the LORD a ram without blemish out of the flocks, with thy estimation by shekels of silver, after the shekel of the sanctuary, for a trespass offering.

Here we go you don't have to supply an actual ram, money will do.

¹⁶And he shall make amends for the harm that he hath done in the holy thing, and shall add the fifth part thereto, and give it unto the priest: and the priest shall make an atonement for him with the ram of the trespass offering, and it shall be forgiven him.

¹⁷And if a soul sin, and commit any of these things which are forbidden to be done by the commandments of the LORD; though he wist it not, yet is he guilty, and shall bear his iniquity.

¹⁸And he shall bring a ram without blemish out of the flock, with thy estimation, for a trespass offering, unto the priest: and the priest shall make an atonement for him concerning his ignorance wherein he erred and wist it not, and it shall be forgiven him.

¹⁹It is a trespass offering: he hath certainly trespassed against the LORD.

What do you think would happen, if in one of the worlds great churches people slapped a calf or young goat on the collection plate. Would the pope or one of his cardinals reach for the sacrificial knife or would they be calling the police ?

Leviticus 4

¹And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

²Speak unto the children of Israel, saying, If a soul shall sin through ignorance against any of the commandments of the LORD concerning things which ought not to be done, and shall do against any of them:

³If the priest that is anointed do sin according to the sin of the people; then let him bring for his sin, which he hath sinned, a young bullock without blemish unto the LORD for a sin offering.

So it is Ok to sin if you can spare an unblemished bullock. This seems familiar, even today you can commit many crimes and get away with it if you can afford the right bullocks lawyers.

⁴And he shall bring the bullock unto the door of the tabernacle of the congregation before the LORD; and shall lay his hand upon the bullock's head, and kill the bullock before the LORD.

⁵And the priest that is anointed shall take of the bullock's blood, and bring it to the tabernacle of the congregation:

There's many who wanted to do the same to their lawyers too.

⁶And the priest shall dip his finger in the blood, and sprinkle of the blood seven times before the LORD, before the vail of the sanctuary.

⁷And the priest shall put some of the blood upon the horns of the altar of sweet incense before the LORD, which is in the tabernacle of the congregation; and shall pour all the blood of the bullock at the bottom of the altar of the burnt offering, which is at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.

⁸And he shall take off from it all the fat of the bullock for the sin offering; the fat that covereth the inwards, and all the fat that is upon the inwards,

⁹And the two kidneys, and the fat that is upon them, which is by the flanks, and the caul above the liver, with the kidneys, it shall he take away,

¹⁰As it was taken off from the bullock of the sacrifice of peace offerings: and the priest shall burn them upon the altar of the burnt offering.

¹¹And the skin of the bullock, and all his flesh, with his head, and with his legs, and his inwards, and his dung,

¹²Even the whole bullock shall he carry forth without the camp unto a clean place, where the ashes are poured out, and burn him on the wood with fire: where the ashes are poured out shall he be burnt.

¹³And if the whole congregation of Israel sin through ignorance, and the thing be hid from the eyes of the assembly, and they have done somewhat against any of the commandments of the LORD concerning things which should not be done, and are guilty;

¹⁴When the sin, which they have sinned against it, is known, then the congregation shall offer a young bullock for the sin, and bring him before the tabernacle of the congregation.

¹⁵And the elders of the congregation shall lay their hands upon the head of the bullock before the LORD: and the bullock shall be killed before the LORD.

¹⁶And the priest that is anointed shall bring of the bullock's blood to the tabernacle of the congregation:

¹⁷And the priest shall dip his finger in some of the blood, and sprinkle it seven times before the LORD, even before the vail.

¹⁸And he shall put some of the blood upon the horns of the altar which is before the LORD, that is in the tabernacle of the congregation, and shall pour out all the blood at the bottom of the altar of the burnt offering, which is at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.

¹⁹And he shall take all his fat from him, and burn it upon the altar.

²⁰And he shall do with the bullock as he did with the bullock for a sin offering, so shall he do with this: and the priest shall make an atonement for them, and it shall be forgiven them.

²¹And he shall carry forth the bullock without the camp, and burn him as he burned the first bullock: it is a sin offering for the congregation.

²²When a ruler hath sinned, and done somewhat through ignorance against any of the commandments of the LORD his God concerning things which should not be done, and is guilty;

²³Or if his sin, wherein he hath sinned, come to his knowledge; he shall bring his offering, a kid of the goats, a male without blemish:

²⁴And he shall lay his hand upon the head of the goat, and kill it in the place where they kill the burnt offering before the LORD: it is a sin offering.

²⁵And the priest shall take of the blood of the sin offering with his finger, and put it upon the horns of the altar of burnt offering, and shall pour out his blood at the bottom of the altar of burnt offering.

²⁶And he shall burn all his fat upon the altar, as the fat of the sacrifice of peace offerings: and the priest shall make an atonement for him as concerning his sin, and it shall be forgiven him.

²⁷And if any one of the common people sin through ignorance, while he doeth somewhat against any of the commandments of the LORD concerning things which ought not to be done, and be guilty;

²⁸Or if his sin, which he hath sinned, come to his knowledge: then he shall bring his offering, a kid of the goats, a female without blemish, for his sin which he hath sinned.

²⁹And he shall lay his hand upon the head of the sin offering, and slay the sin offering in the place of the burnt offering.

³⁰And the priest shall take of the blood thereof with his finger, and put it upon the horns of the altar of burnt offering, and shall pour out all the blood thereof at the bottom of the altar.

³¹And he shall take away all the fat thereof, as the fat is taken away from off the sacrifice of peace offerings; and the priest shall burn it upon the altar for a sweet savour unto the LORD; and the priest shall make an atonement for him, and it shall be forgiven him.

³²And if he bring a lamb for a sin offering, he shall bring it a female without blemish.

They say a change is as good as a rest.

³³And he shall lay his hand upon the head of the sin offering, and slay it for a sin offering in the place where they kill the burnt offering.

³⁴And the priest shall take of the blood of the sin offering with his finger, and put it upon the horns of the altar of burnt offering, and shall pour out all the blood thereof at the bottom of the altar:

³⁵And he shall take away all the fat thereof, as the fat of the lamb is taken away from the sacrifice of the peace offerings; and the priest shall burn them upon the altar, according to the offerings made by fire unto the LORD: and the priest shall make an atonement for his sin that he hath committed, and it shall be forgiven him.

So the lesson so far seems to be . You can fleece the cogregation of anything as long as you convince them they need to pay it for redemption and you dress it up in an appropriate ritual........A lesson learned well by many churches and so called charismatic leaders.

Leviticus 3

Leviticus 3

¹And if his oblation be a sacrifice of peace offering, if he offer it of the herd; whether it be a male or female, he shall offer it without blemish before the LORD.

²And he shall lay his hand upon the head of his offering, and kill it at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation: and Aaron's sons the priests shall sprinkle the blood upon the altar round about.

This seems a strange place to kill something and then to sprinkle the blood around. The stench must have been awful. Why would you have rotting blood around ? Then again it is no real surprise the god of the Israelites gets off on the smell of death.

³And he shall offer of the sacrifice of the peace offering an offering made by fire unto the LORD; the fat that covereth the inwards, and all the fat that is upon the inwards,

Would this have been different if gods chosen people were british and had onions to go with the tripe.

⁴And the two kidneys, and the fat that is on them, which is by the flanks, and the caul above the liver, with the kidneys, it shall he take away.

Mmmmm kidneys.

⁵And Aaron's sons shall burn it on the altar upon the burnt sacrifice, which is upon the wood that is on the fire: it is an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD.

⁶And if his offering for a sacrifice of peace offering unto the LORD be of the flock; male or female, he shall offer it without blemish.

⁷If he offer a lamb for his offering, then shall he offer it before the LORD.

⁸And he shall lay his hand upon the head of his offering, and kill it before the tabernacle of the congregation: and Aaron's sons shall sprinkle the blood thereof round about upon the altar.

⁹And he shall offer of the sacrifice of the peace offering an offering made by fire unto the LORD; the fat thereof, and the whole rump, it shall he take off hard by the backbone; and the fat that covereth the inwards, and all the fat that is upon the inwards,

¹⁰And the two kidneys, and the fat that is upon them, which is by the flanks, and the caul above the liver, with the kidneys, it shall he take away.

¹¹And the priest shall burn it upon the altar: it is the food of the offering made by fire unto the LORD.

¹²And if his offering be a goat, then he shall offer it before the LORD.

¹³And he shall lay his hand upon the head of it, and kill it before the tabernacle of the congregation: and the sons of Aaron shall sprinkle the blood thereof upon the altar round about.

¹⁴And he shall offer thereof his offering, even an offering made by fire unto the LORD; the fat that covereth the inwards, and all the fat that is upon the inwards,

¹⁵And the two kidneys, and the fat that is upon them, which is by the flanks, and the caul above the liver, with the kidneys, it shall he take away.

I can't make up my mind whether the repetition is because this text was designed as practice for a novice scribe or whether it is a early form of legal writing.

¹⁶And the priest shall burn them upon the altar: it is the food of the offering made by fire for a sweet savour: all the fat is the LORD's.

¹⁷It shall be a perpetual statute for your generations throughout all your dwellings, that ye eat neither fat nor blood.
Although food spoiling must have been an issue they seem to be wasting a great percentage of their food stuffs. Or were the common people living far more frugally.

Leviticus 2

Leviticus 2

¹And when any will offer a meat offering unto the LORD, his offering shall be of fine flour; and he shall pour oil upon it, and put frankincense thereon:

Jethro has got bored with nice slabs of meat he fancies pies and pasties.

²And he shall bring it to Aaron's sons the priests: and he shall take thereout his handful of the flour thereof, and of the oil thereof, with all the frankincense thereof; and the priest shall burn the memorial of it upon the altar, to be an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD:

³And the remnant of the meat offering shall be Aaron's and his sons': it is a thing most holy of the offerings of the LORD made by fire.

At least they are admitting the "priesthood" is getting the leftovers.

⁴And if thou bring an oblation of a meat offering baken in the oven, it shall be unleavened cakes of fine flour mingled with oil, or unleavened wafers anointed with oil.

⁵And if thy oblation be a meat offering baken in a pan, it shall be of fine flour unleavened, mingled with oil.

Pies,pasties and crispy pancakes.

Seems to be working like fast food in reverse, I hope those robes have plenty of room in them, Aaron and co must be getting fat.

⁶Thou shalt part it in pieces, and pour oil thereon: it is a meat offering.

⁷And if thy oblation be a meat offering baken in the fryingpan, it shall be made of fine flour with oil.

I see god is still showing his divine knowledge of all things..... He seems to know fuck all about cholesterol.

Then again he has mentioned "hardening of hearts" perhaps it meant hardening of arteries.

⁸And thou shalt bring the meat offering that is made of these things unto the LORD: and when it is presented unto the priest, he shall bring it unto the altar.

⁹And the priest shall take from the meat offering a memorial thereof, and shall burn it upon the altar: it is an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD.

¹⁰And that which is left of the meat offering shall be Aaron's and his sons': it is a thing most holy of the offerings of the LORD made by fire.

¹¹No meat offering, which ye shall bring unto the LORD, shall be made with leaven: for ye shall burn no leaven, nor any honey, in any offering of the LORD made by fire.

I assume leaven is yeast....no destroying things for brewing then.

¹²As for the oblation of the firstfruits, ye shall offer them unto the LORD: but they shall not be burnt on the altar for a sweet savour.

¹³And every oblation of thy meat offering shalt thou season with salt; neither shalt thou suffer the salt of the covenant of thy God to be lacking from thy meat offering: with all thine offerings thou shalt offer salt.

¹⁴And if thou offer a meat offering of thy firstfruits unto the LORD, thou shalt offer for the meat offering of thy firstfruits green ears of corn dried by the fire, even corn beaten out of full ears.

¹⁵And thou shalt put oil upon it, and lay frankincense thereon: it is a meat offering.

¹⁶And the priest shall burn the memorial of it, part of the beaten corn thereof, and part of the oil thereof, with all the frankincense thereof: it is an offering made by fire unto the LORD

Leviticus 1

Leviticus 1

¹And the LORD called unto Moses, and spake unto him out of the tabernacle of the congregation, saying,

²Speak unto the children of Israel, and say unto them, If any man of you bring an offering unto the LORD, ye shall bring your offering of the cattle, even of the herd, and of the flock.

³If his offering be a burnt sacrifice of the herd, let him offer a male without blemish: he shall offer it of his own voluntary will at the door of the tabernacle of the congregation before the LORD.

Because only the best is good enough for de lawd even if he says caused the blemishes he don't want any chewy bits in his sammiches.

⁴And he shall put his hand upon the head of the burnt offering; and it shall be accepted for him to make atonement for him.

⁵And he shall kill the bullock before the LORD: and the priests, Aaron's sons, shall bring the blood, and sprinkle the blood round about upon the altar that is by the door of the tabernacle of the congregation.

⁶And he shall flay the burnt offering, and cut it into his pieces.

⁷And the sons of Aaron the priest shall put fire upon the altar, and lay the wood in order upon the fire:

⁸And the priests, Aaron's sons, shall lay the parts, the head, and the fat, in order upon the wood that is on the fire which is upon the altar:

⁹But his inwards and his legs shall he wash in water: and the priest shall burn all on the altar, to be a burnt sacrifice, an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD.

¹⁰And if his offering be of the flocks, namely, of the sheep, or of the goats, for a burnt sacrifice; he shall bring it a male without blemish.

It surprises me that with gods fetish for young male flesh that a glory hole wasn't included in the tent of the tabernacle. But maybe that is the reality of the catholic church they aren't paedophile priests they are just consuming young male flesh for de lawd.

¹¹And he shall kill it on the side of the altar northward before the LORD: and the priests, Aaron's sons, shall sprinkle his blood round about upon the altar.

¹²And he shall cut it into his pieces, with his head and his fat: and the priest shall lay them in order on the wood that is on the fire which is upon the altar:

¹³But he shall wash the inwards and the legs with water: and the priest shall bring it all, and burn it upon the altar: it is a burnt sacrifice, an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD.

¹⁴And if the burnt sacrifice for his offering to the LORD be of fowls, then he shall bring his offering of turtledoves, or of young pigeons.

¹⁵And the priest shall bring it unto the altar, and wring off his head, and burn it on the altar; and the blood thereof shall be wrung out at the side of the altar:

¹⁶And he shall pluck away his crop with his feathers, and cast it beside the altar on the east part, by the place of the ashes:

¹⁷And he shall cleave it with the wings thereof, but shall not divide it asunder: and the priest shall burn it upon the altar, upon the wood that is upon the fire: it is a burnt sacrifice, an offering made by fire, of a sweet savour unto the LORD.
You can call me cynical if you want but the only reason I can see for this is that through the ritualized cremation and sleight of hand the "priests get the choicest cuts and can mask the smell of cooking with the acrid smoke from the remaining carcasses. You have got to admire their ingenuity or just shudder at the congregations gullibility.

Exodus Recap

Well there we have it, the Israelites break from their cruel Egyptian masters by the clever leadership of the great Moses with the help of their all seeing god.A god that is so wise he leads them to a land that although green at times is fairly equatorial thus prone to drought and therefore famine. Ok it is a bit further but why didn't he lead them to somewhere with a bit more ambient climate. Instead of hanging around in the desert for fourty years they could have trekked vaguely northwards to almost anywhere vaguely European which although greatly increases your chances of meeting the french has got to be better than the continual strife....then again de lard said they were his chosen people ....just not what for.

Or not........We started with the "miraculous" saving of the baby Moses which so happens to be almost Identical to the divine saving of Sargon the great, the founder of the Akkadian city state empire of approximately 1,000 years earlier.
As a young man Moses allegedly raised as a prince commits manslaughter in dubious circumstances and goes on the lam.

If he was part of the royal household as the bible states I doubt he would have much to fear from prosecution unless the person he killed was of a higher social rank than himself. This begs the question, What was his social status ? (as he seems a bit backward and seems to be treated as a royal toy)

While on the lam he meets a young woman at the local watering hole. Her father, a Midianite priest seems happy to marry his daughter off to this fugitive.After which when Moses is alone god appears in the form of a burning bush. It is noteworthy that the text makes a point of Moses being alone. Upon receiving instructions from de lawd Moses goes back to Egypt.
Again begging the questions Would he not still have the same (if any ) repercussions from his crime ?
If he had no crime to answer for why did he run in the first place ?
but mostly, Why is the great all powerful creator of the universe choosing to work through a gullible half wit.

We then return to Egypt where Moses engages in a series of cheap parlour tricks with the court magician to try to extract the "poor slave israelite nation".

This fails so the god of love brings about a series of natural disasters causing suffering and death to millions of Egyptians but pharoah remains unconvinced to "letz de peeplz goez ! "
Eventually with the tenth and final "plague" Pharoah relents and these "poor slaves" gather all their belongings and herds ???? and set about leaving.
Pharoah, then inexplicably changes his mind (you would have thought the collapse of his civilization a bit more pressing) and decides to go after the "millions" of Israelites with 600 chariots.

De lawd again comes to the rescue not by relocating the Israelites or just causing the chariots to get lost/ lose wheels/not see the Isrealites butin another repeat of the Sargon legend and by showing his love and mercy, by drowning fucking the lot.

You would now imagine that Moses would be public enemy no.1, but he seems to slip out of the egyptian conciousness and then manages to get lost in the desert.

His father in-law finds him when no-one not even moses knows where he is,and after a point is made of Jethro leaving again, three days later, god amazingly appears "with fire smoke and thunder"
How long would it take a few obedient men to prepare a smoke screen?

Moses thens has a big pow- wow with the omnipotent one. Who for some reason seems to need to relieve the ex- slaves of all their gold and finery to make a box, some furniture and a fancy tent.

It seems patently obvious to me that Jethro, Moses father In-law was the guiding force behind Moses's actions. I also wonder whether Jethro and Aaron, Moses brother were one and the same ?
I also suspect this account was written long after the facts and the facts merged to become entertaining stories, then myth and later religion.