Monday, 19 October 2009

Judges 3

Sorry for the delay in this but real life has taken up alot of time recently, much work, many parties and oddly enough ,research and fatigue caused by all, have strained my brain to a degree of writers block

1Now these are the nations which the LORD left, to prove Israel by them, even as many of Israel as had not known all the wars of Canaan;

What! ?........Did not de lard state time and again things like I give you this land, take it from those already there and of cities kill every motherfucking living thing.

Someone therefore seems to be admitting that de lard either didn't say what he was supposed to or wasn't hard enough to follow up on his threats/promises.

2Only that the generations of the children of Israel might know, to teach them war, at the least such as before knew nothing thereof;

3Namely, five lords of the Philistines, and all the Canaanites, and the Sidonians, and the Hivites that dwelt in mount Lebanon, from mount Baalhermon unto the entering in of Hamath.

4And they were to prove Israel by them, to know whether they would hearken unto the commandments of the LORD, which he commanded their fathers by the hand of Moses.

Oh I see ! Where as I had thought, they were now the supplicant love slaves of de lard, there is no longer a cunning power mad conman prophet,so he now stops talking to them. Does someone want to tell me again of the love of de lard.

5And the children of Israel dwelt among the Canaanites, Hittites, and Amorites, and Perizzites, and Hivites, and Jebusites:

So naturally with out a madman prophet stirring them up the guidance of de lard they go back to normal lives.

6And they took their daughters to be their wives, and gave their daughters to their sons, and served their gods.

Just an observation....But to my view of what the supposed "power" of de lard is, or should be. Is it not contemptible that to and from their deity go out the window with a little bit of hot pussy on offer ? Especially from those that apparently witnessed it.

7And the children of Israel did evil in the sight of the LORD, and forgat the LORD their God, and served Baalim and the groves.

Fuck me ! I just realised, for once de lard didn't lie.......He is a jealous god !

8Therefore the anger of the LORD was hot against Israel, and he sold them into the hand of Chushanrishathaim king of Mesopotamia: and the children of Israel served Chushanrishathaim eight years.

I have been hunting for days now trying to match up Chushanrishathaim to a monarch ruling in or around Mesopotamia to give verification either of events or of dates.

Allegedly we are supposed to be in the twelfth to the eleventh BCE. I have a couple of times pointed out similarities with the invasion of the mysterious "sea peoples" and asked whether biblical scholars have erred in assuming first there was only one Moses and secondly that Joshua immediately followed the original Moses.

9And when the children of Israel cried unto the LORD, the LORD raised up a deliverer to the children of Israel, who delivered them, even Othniel the son of Kenaz, Caleb's younger brother.

10And the Spirit of the LORD came upon him, and he judged Israel, and went out to war: and the LORD delivered Chushanrishathaim king of Mesopotamia into his hand; and his hand prevailed against Chushanrishathaim.

So he went mad and started with the, " being a cunt" bit that had worked so well for all those other psychopaths before him.

11And the land had rest forty years. And Othniel the son of Kenaz died.

12And the children of Israel did evil again in the sight of the LORD: and the LORD strengthened Eglon the king of Moab against Israel, because they had done evil in the sight of the LORD.

We have been here before. The almighty, alknowing, allseeing invisible autocrat seems to be incapable of knowing or seeing the obvious fact that they are inherently untrustworthy and if he wants to them to behave themselves all he needs to do is assure them he is there.

13And he gathered unto him the children of Ammon and Amalek, and went and smote Israel, and possessed the city of palm trees.

14So the children of Israel served Eglon the king of Moab eighteen years.

15But when the children of Israel cried unto the LORD, the LORD raised them up a deliverer, Ehud the son of Gera, a Benjamite, a man lefthanded: and by him the children of Israel sent a present unto Eglon the king of Moab.

16But Ehud made him a dagger which had two edges, of a cubit length; and he did gird it under his raiment upon his right thigh.

17And he brought the present unto Eglon king of Moab: and Eglon was a very fat man.

18And when he had made an end to offer the present, he sent away the people that bare the present.

19But he himself turned again from the quarries that were by Gilgal, and said, I have a secret errand unto thee, O king: who said, Keep silence. And all that stood by him went out from him.

20And Ehud came unto him; and he was sitting in a summer parlour, which he had for himself alone. And Ehud said, I have a message from God unto thee. And he arose out of his seat.

21And Ehud put forth his left hand, and took the dagger from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly:

22And the haft also went in after the blade; and the fat closed upon the blade, so that he could not draw the dagger out of his belly; and the dirt came out.

23Then Ehud went forth through the porch, and shut the doors of the parlour upon him, and locked them.

24When he was gone out, his servants came; and when they saw that, behold, the doors of the parlour were locked, they said, Surely he covereth his feet in his summer chamber.

I have to ask.......Is this a true translation ? He was a fat bloke, could he see his feet?

Ah ! the NLT has this "They thought he might be using the latrine in the room"

25And they tarried till they were ashamed: and, behold, he opened not the doors of the parlour; therefore they took a key, and opened them: and, behold, their lord was fallen down dead on the earth.

26And Ehud escaped while they tarried, and passed beyond the quarries, and escaped unto Seirath.

27And it came to pass, when he was come, that he blew a trumpet in the mountain of Ephraim, and the children of Israel went down with him from the mount, and he before them.

28And he said unto them, Follow after me: for the LORD hath delivered your enemies the Moabites into your hand. And they went down after him, and took the fords of Jordan toward Moab, and suffered not a man to pass over.

29And they slew of Moab at that time about ten thousand men, all lusty, and all men of valour; and there escaped not a man.

30So Moab was subdued that day under the hand of Israel. And the land had rest fourscore years.

31And after him was Shamgar the son of Anath, which slew of the Philistines six hundred men with an ox goad: and he also delivered Israel.


uzza said...

Hmmm. The Secret Service might want to keep an eye on this Ehud character. Or any of his followers.

Baal's Bum said...

It,s probably his descendants that make up the majority of the secret service....In both our countries