Monday, 23 March 2009

Deuteronomy 18

1The priests the Levites, and all the tribe of Levi, shall have no part nor inheritance with Israel: they shall eat the offerings of the LORD made by fire, and his inheritance.

At last ! An admission that de lard had a father, else how would de lard have inheritance ?

2Therefore shall they have no inheritance among their brethren: the LORD is their inheritance, as he hath said unto them.

Not directly of course, but through oracles or prophets

3And this shall be the priest's due from the people, from them that offer a sacrifice, whether it be ox or sheep; and they shall give unto the priest the shoulder, and the two cheeks, and the maw.

Funny how these sacrifices to de lard always end up with a good meal for the priesthood.

4The firstfruit also of thy corn, of thy wine, and of thine oil, and the first of the fleece of thy sheep, shalt thou give him.

5For the LORD thy God hath chosen him out of all thy tribes, to stand to minister in the name of the LORD, him and his sons for ever.

If de lard had really chosen these people from his chosen it would imply a breeding programme. The fact that there are now not any specific differences between the levites descendants and the rest of humanity implies one of several things,either the levites have been fucking out of their desired genetic pool, de lard has the attention span of a retarded galactic goldfish or de lard just don't exist.

6And if a Levite come from any of thy gates out of all Israel, where he sojourned, and come with all the desire of his mind unto the place which the LORD shall choose;

7Then he shall minister in the name of the LORD his God, as all his brethren the Levites do, which stand there before the LORD.

8They shall have like portions to eat, beside that which cometh of the sale of his patrimony.

They must have been some fat fuckers.

9When thou art come into the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee, thou shalt not learn to do after the abominations of those nations.

Like freedom of thought, bacon and seafood.

10There shall not be found among you any one that maketh his son or his daughter to pass through the fire, or that useth divination, or an observer of times, or an enchanter, or a witch.

11Or a charmer, or a consulter with familiar spirits, or a wizard, or a necromancer.

Does this not incude speaking bollocks in tongues ?

12For all that do these things are an abomination unto the LORD: and because of these abominations the LORD thy God doth drive them out from before thee.

13Thou shalt be perfect with the LORD thy God.

Fuck me! According to his own propaganda de lard started with a clean slate and fucked it up. He couldn't out wit a woman so naive she was beyond innocence, who was coerced by persuasive python to disobey an order she couldn't have really understood.

Now he wants a minuscule portion of her alleged descendants not to strive for perfection but to be perfect, what a cunt why should he expect more from us than he is capable of himself.

14For these nations, which thou shalt possess, hearkened unto observers of times, and unto diviners: but as for thee, the LORD thy God hath not suffered thee so to do.

15The LORD thy God will raise up unto thee a Prophet from the midst of thee, of thy brethren, like unto me; unto him ye shall hearken;

So what exactly is the difference between an embodied oracle, a seer and a prophet ?

16According to all that thou desiredst of the LORD thy God in Horeb in the day of the assembly, saying, Let me not hear again the voice of the LORD my God, neither let me see this great fire any more, that I die not.

17And the LORD said unto me, They have well spoken that which they have spoken.

18I will raise them up a Prophet from among their brethren, like unto thee, and will put my words in his mouth; and he shall speak unto them all that I shall command him.

Is this what Mr Tedder referred to ? If so it says prophet not messiah.

19And it shall come to pass, that whosoever will not hearken unto my words which he shall speak in my name, I will require it of him.

20But the prophet, which shall presume to speak a word in my name, which I have not commanded him to speak, or that shall speak in the name of other gods, even that prophet shall die.

I say de lard said to me "Tell my children they have made me up and I don't exist"

21And if thou say in thine heart, How shall we know the word which the LORD hath not spoken?

A while back it talked of your heart being circumcised, now you can speak through your heart. I say this , If you can hear your heart speak you know it's talking bollocks

22When a prophet speaketh in the name of the LORD, if the thing follow not, nor come to pass, that is the thing which the LORD hath not spoken, but the prophet hath spoken it presumptuously: thou shalt not be afraid of him.

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