Tuesday, 21 October 2008

Leviticus 21

1And the LORD said unto Moses, Speak unto the priests the sons of Aaron, and say unto them, There shall none be defiled for the dead among his people:

These verses are telling them they are not allowed to help with the preparation for burial with a few exceptions.

2But for his kin, that is near unto him, that is, for his mother, and for his father, and for his son, and for his daughter, and for his brother.

3And for his sister a virgin, that is nigh unto him, which hath had no husband; for her may he be defiled.

4But he shall not defile himself, being a chief man among his people, to profane himself.

5They shall not make baldness upon their head, neither shall they shave off the corner of their beard, nor make any cuttings in their flesh.

How is it the people which proclaim the loudest for following gods laws(especially for teh gay) are often clean shaven or with really neat trimmed beards in total defience of this rule.

6They shall be holy unto their God, and not profane the name of their God: for the offerings of the LORD made by fire, and the bread of their God, they do offer: therefore they shall be holy.

Am I breaking this law when I say JHVH is a cunt

How about if I say Allah is a cunt(apparently I am supposed to write pbuh after his and Mo's name......I think it stands for Pigshit be upon him)Well it does now!

7They shall not take a wife that is a whore, or profane; neither shall they take a woman put away from her husband: for he is holy unto his God.

8Thou shalt sanctify him therefore; for he offereth the bread of thy God: he shall be holy unto thee: for I the LORD, which sanctify you, am holy.

9And the daughter of any priest, if she profane herself by playing the whore, she profaneth her father: she shall be burnt with fire.

AAhhh vicars daughters and sons you can always guarantee a good time with them.

10And he that is the high priest among his brethren, upon whose head the anointing oil was poured, and that is consecrated to put on the garments, shall not uncover his head, nor rend his clothes;

11Neither shall he go in to any dead body, nor defile himself for his father, or for his mother;

12Neither shall he go out of the sanctuary, nor profane the sanctuary of his God; for the crown of the anointing oil of his God is upon him: I am the LORD.

Actually all these are going on about defiling and profanity against his god not mine so any defilement that is not against your own god is ok... is that what its saying?

13And he shall take a wife in her virginity.

So she won't know two to three inches isn't normal

14A widow, or a divorced woman, or profane, or an harlot, these shall he not take: but he shall take a virgin of his own people to wife.

15Neither shall he profane his seed among his people: for I the LORD do sanctify him.

16And the LORD spake unto Moses, saying,

Here we find out how the "loving god" feels about the disabled,disfigured that according to him created.

17Speak unto Aaron, saying, Whosoever he be of thy seed in their generations that hath any blemish, let him not approach to offer the bread of his God.

18For whatsoever man he be that hath a blemish, he shall not approach: a blind man, or a lame, or he that hath a flat nose, or any thing superfluous,

19Or a man that is brokenfooted, or brokenhanded,

20Or crookbackt, or a dwarf, or that hath a blemish in his eye, or be scurvy, or scabbed, or hath his stones broken;

21No man that hath a blemish of the seed of Aaron the priest shall come nigh to offer the offerings of the LORD made by fire: he hath a blemish; he shall not come nigh to offer the bread of his God.

22He shall eat the bread of his God, both of the most holy, and of the holy.

23Only he shall not go in unto the vail, nor come nigh unto the altar, because he hath a blemish; that he profane not my sanctuaries: for I the LORD do sanctify them.

Can you feel the love.....gods love

24And Moses told it unto Aaron, and to his sons, and unto all the children of Israel.


Buffy said...

You're so going to hell. That's good though because all the best people will be there.

Baal's Bum said...

We must make sure to look each other up, knock back a few beers and laugh at all the xtians when the realise they were wrong.