Genesis 29

<sup>Genesis 29


1</sup>Then Jacob went on his journey, and came into the land of the people of the east.
And like any horny young lad he made straight for the local watering hole.
²And he looked, and behold a well in the field, and, lo, there were three flocks of sheep lying by it; for out of that well they watered the flocks: and a great stone was upon the well's mouth.
³And thither were all the flocks gathered: and they rolled the stone from the well's mouth, and watered the sheep, and put the stone again upon the well's mouth in his place.
⁴And Jacob said unto them, My brethren, whence be ye? And they said, Of Haran are we.
⁵And he said unto them, Know ye Laban the son of Nahor? And they said, We know him.Laban the son of Nahor? WTF. Were we not just told Laban, son of Bethuel the Syrian ? Either this translator was crap or some scribe is full of shit !
⁶And he said unto them, Is he well? And they said, He is well: and, behold, Rachel his daughter cometh with the sheep.
Like a badly scripted soap opera isn't it

⁷And he said, Lo, it is yet high day, neither is it time that the cattle should be gathered together: water ye the sheep, and go and feed them.
⁸And they said, We cannot, until all the flocks be gathered together, and till they roll the stone from the well's mouth; then we water the sheep.
⁹And while he yet spake with them, Rachel came with her father's sheep; for she kept them.
¹⁰And it came to pass, when Jacob saw Rachel the daughter of Laban his mother's brother, and the sheep of Laban his mother's brother, that Jacob went near, and rolled the stone from the well's mouth, and watered the flock of Laban his mother's brother.
¹¹And Jacob kissed Rachel, and lifted up his voice, and wept.
Hey steady on there boy she's not one of your goats. Talking first, a bit of conversation, woo her not just grab her arse and stick your tongue down her throat.
¹²And Jacob told Rachel that he was her father's brother, and that he was Rebekah's son: and she ran and told her father.
I am beginning to wonder whether some scribe at some time with failing eyesight and failing memory had lost his place and just started writing again when he found a word he recognised because again we have too much coincidence.
¹³And it came to pass, when Laban heard the tidings of Jacob his sister's son, that he ran to meet him, and embraced him, and kissed him, and brought him to his house. And he told Laban all these things.
¹⁴And Laban said to him, Surely thou art my bone and my flesh. And he abode with him the space of a month.
¹⁵And Laban said unto Jacob, Because thou art my brother, shouldest thou therefore serve me for nought? tell me, what shall thy wages be?
¹⁶And Laban had two daughters: the name of the elder was Leah, and the name of the younger was Rachel.
¹⁷Leah was tender eyed; but Rachel was beautiful and well favoured.
¹⁸And Jacob loved Rachel; and said, I will serve thee seven years for Rachel thy younger daughter.
She was taller than a goat,
Less hairy than a goat,
but smelt about the same nonetheless .
¹⁹And Laban said, It is better that I give her to thee, than that I should give her to another man: abide with me.
²⁰And Jacob served seven years for Rachel; and they seemed unto him but a few days, for the love he had to her.
Jacob should have brought the servant that acquired his mother, He certainly isn'tany good at bargaining.Or perhaps he didn't bring him for that reason.
²¹And Jacob said unto Laban, Give me my wife, for my days are fulfilled, that I may go in unto her.
²²And Laban gathered together all the men of the place, and made a feast.
²³And it came to pass in the evening, that he took Leah his daughter, and brought her to him; and he went in unto her.
²⁴And Laban gave unto his daughter Leah Zilpah his maid for an handmaid.
²⁵And it came to pass, that in the morning, behold, it was Leah: and he said to Laban, What is this thou hast done unto me? did not I serve with thee for Rachel? wherefore then hast thou beguiled me?
Jacob listen, conversation first, wooing , foreplay, do not just slam in the lamb as if she was a goat.I know you've been waiting seven years but at least have enough respect to ask"with whom am I haveing the pleasure.
²⁶And Laban said, It must not be so done in our country, to give the younger before the firstborn.
So jacobs been doing whatever he's been doing for Laban for seven years and he palms him of with the ugly one. How do I know she is ugly ? Because she hasn't been palmed off on anyone else in seven years.
²⁷Fulfil her week, and we will give thee this also for the service which thou shalt serve with me yet seven other years.
²⁸And Jacob did so, and fulfilled her week: and he gave him Rachel his daughter to wife also.
²⁹And Laban gave to Rachel his daughter Bilhah his handmaid to be her maid.
³⁰And he went in also unto Rachel, and he loved also Rachel more than Leah, and served with him yet seven other years.
³¹And when the LORD saw that Leah was hated, he opened her womb: but Rachel was barren.
Or because Jacob was rogering Rachel repetitively Leah was selling her wares down at the Temple.
³²And Leah conceived, and bare a son, and she called his name Reuben: for she said, Surely the LORD hath looked upon my affliction; now therefore my husband will love me.
As I pointed out earlier a Temple prostitution pregnancy was seen as a gift from god.
³³And she conceived again, and bare a son; and said, Because the LORD hath heard I was hated, he hath therefore given me this son also: and she called his name Simeon.
³⁴And she conceived again, and bare a son; and said, Now this time will my husband be joined unto me, because I have born him three sons: therefore was his name called Levi.³⁵And she conceived again, and bare a son: and she said, Now will I praise the LORD: therefore she called his name Judah; and left bearing.

Sudden stop there is there a page missing ? Did the scribe suffer a heart attack ?
She left bearing what?